I WILL CROCHET YOU INTO SUBMISSION, FUCKERS.
[turns all of your pasta queer] NO PASTA IS SAFE
I am the law.
I am that waffle so perfect you only dreamed about it and you will weep forever that you will never actually have me
I contain the gods? That sounds pretty useful, actually. Nyarlathotep is a useful individual to have on one’s side.
Holy crap, I’m a bestselling author!
I can take on the abilities of the main character of any movie I watch. The Force. Mastery of martial arts. Supreme intelligence. I am… THE FILM TWIT!